I remember staring at my phone, willing myself to pick it up, but my arm felt like lead. I needed to raise support to keep my ministry job, but I was exhausted by the answering machines and the polite "we'll pray about it" rejections. I didn't make the call. I just crashed onto my bed and stared at the ceiling, wondering how I was going to cover my salary. When I'm dealing with more than I can handle, it's hard to share my weaknesses. If I was a strong Christian, shouldn't I be able to power through disappointment?
2 Corinthians 12:7b-10
Therefore, so that I would not exalt myself, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to torment me so that I would not exalt myself. Concerning this, I pleaded with the Lord three times that it would leave me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is perfected in weakness." Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may reside in me. So I take pleasure in weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and in difficulties, for the sake of Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
If anyone deserved a "Yes" to their prayers, it was Paul. He had been stoned, shipwrecked, and beaten for the sake of the Gospel. Yet when he begs God to remove this "messenger of Satan" (a challenge which Paul does not explain), God says No. Remember, Paul wrote this to a church that was questioning his leadership. Is this the kind of confession you would make to people who already question your spiritual credentials? Most organizations, including churches and ministries, hire and fire on the basis of competence. We want strong, impressive problem solvers on our team. But when Paul asked God to take away his weaknesses, he didn't get strength. Instead, God spoke to him, and offered him grace. Paul doesn't say God removed his weakness and then he was strong. He says when he was struggling, God's power showed up. We often view our internal struggles and external limitations as the obstacle to our faith. We think, 'If God would take care of these problems, then I could trust him.' But God works the opposite way: "These difficulties are how you learn to depend on me."
When you imagine a "strong Christian," what do they look like? How does that image compare to Paul here?
Paul says God's power is "perfected" in weakness. What is one specific weakness you are trying to hide or fix?
If you truly believed God's power was found in your weakness, would it change how you talked to your friends this week?
Knowing God's strength in hard times rarely feels like strength. Instead, it often feels like a collapse. Set a timer for 2 minutes. Sit in silence. Identify the one thing you are trying to power through on your own. Open your hands on your lap and whisper: "God, I cannot fix this. But You are with me."
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